Thursday, March 30, 2006

Read jwen's blog and found out she's still freaking mad about that sickening gathering. Well, i'm the one who's in the wrong dress code and i am also shortlisted in the nottocall list, and also the attitudeproblem list, and the shorttempered list and many more..
But probably it has become my habit, that whatever she does, doesnt bother me too much. I just find it a lil disgusting maybe more than a little.
Okay, my bday just passed. Though i would say its okay that she,or rather they dont wish me happy birthday. but i'm still bothered by it lah. i know its no big deal, and ppl might find me ridiculous being bothered by these small lil things. but it still bothers. try lah, and see if it will bother you if your friend of 6yr, and 2yrs didnt wish you.
I just hate to think of her.
I'm not mad, either am i depressed or super upset.
it has somehow became my routine, that i'm not supposed to get mad over things like that. honestly speaking, she sorta tamed me. sounds like a animal, but i was more bad-tempered and a very rash person. but with her good attitude, mild-temper, nice and friendly personality, i have no choice but hold my temper. i find it a bit fake though, my attitude shows all my mood. if i'm really unhappy, nothing will really cheer me up. so its not hard to see if i dislike you or not. anyway, my reputation hasnt been gd all this while, so it doesnt matter if ppl find me bad or evil ,whatever. i dont really care anymore. its really sickening to see some good tempered ppl pretending to be fine and nice and friendly.
i'm not sure what i'm doing now and if i'm using good english or if she reads abt it, cause i doubt she bothers anyway. i guess its the me now, nothing can make me real mad. even that gathering didnt make me mad, just feel like grumbling. thats all.
so, making me cry is much more easier than making me mad now. ha.
welcome the new Vans.

Thanks angela yeo! for rmbering my bday. +) love you lots.

Happy Birthday to me!

thanks to: waikit, jiawen, cindy, melf, joan, fad, hazeeq, yuting, karinda, kiateng, michael, yixian, yanle, joan, wynee, dixon, jo, christina, xinyan, jaclyn, debbie. Thanks for your blessings.love you guys.

One year ago, he left us. One year later, we have all continued with our lives.. We still miss you.

Okay, lemme tell you the story for the day. First, I was told that dinner will be at Marina South. Fine, ppl with brains will tell that its a hot place w/o air-con. And so, i happily wore a t-shirt and shorts with sandals. Then when i reached marina sq, supposedly to meet the others to go marina south, i shockingly realised that we'll be going to a resturant that was said to have good food.
Okay, fine, go there and embarrass myself. So i kept quiet and ate with friends who appeared to be like strangers sharing the same table. After dinner then i realised that she* actually called everyone and told them that she* changed the venue. For your info, she* called everyone except me and jwen. And we ended up the idiots who didnt wear to the occasion.
My goodness. I'm 17 and cant wear to the occasion..
READ : WRONG DRESS CODE.
and the food was just errrr...

I truly appreciate the fact that you bother to fake your attitude towards me. I know I'm not lovable or nice, nor am I pretty or humorous, but you still put in effort in bothering me. Honestly, I don't need all the hypocrisy. Thanks, but I would somehow rather my life is all abt myself than having hypocrites. Yes, I do know that the world outside is full of disgusting creatures, and I'll have to face them somehow. Yet, right now, I'll just hope that you'll just pack your stuffs and get out of my life. I do not mind being a loner and get sarcastic remarks and stares or even glares. I will appreciate it very much if you can pack your stuffs and go away. But i'll always rmber the times we shared together, though, there's little but it has somehow thought me a lesson. I'm the attitude girl that thinks highly of myself, thanks.


pls, go away.

There's a story behind everyone of us which makes us the now. The past, probably ain't something to be proud of, but be glad that it has help created a part of you, hopefully it has made you more sensible and thoughtful. The most important part is that you've walked out of your past and learn something from it.
Don't ask me why am i submitting a post so not me, i just want to write down something.

Everything seems fine this few weeks, and I trying my best to enjoy it. 'Cause i feel that it will eventually leave me. 'Fine' doesn't appear in my dictionary. And sometimes, i enjoy looking more than talking. Why did God give us 2 eyes and a mouth, instead of 2 mouths and an eye? 'Cause He knows that human,we, need to look more and speak less. I'm enjoying the time i spent with myself, cause i sometimes get to see how human thinks.
Just the other day, I saw this guy reading his papers in a crowded train and even lean his papers on a lady's arm. So finally she couldnt stand it anymore, and started asking him to keep his papers. Instead of apologising, he retaliated by saying that he was just reading the papers. Sometimes, i feel that we should just be more graceful and nice to the others. Just a lil' bit will be able to light up the other person's day.
Why be so calculating?
I'm in the line of sales right now, and i kinda understand how human are.
Sometimes i'm just so disgusted by the ugly human and the cruel world, but i'm also human, who am i to criticise human?
I'm just a insignificant person, just another person taking in my share of oxygen.

I just got on this cab from the wulu office back home,and i thought it would be me alone, staring at the moving scenery. But the kind cab driver started asking me questions and ended up talking about his own problems. I dont mind, but i just dont understand why Man just cant confide in their own friends and rather talk to strangers that doesnt have anything thing to do with him. He talked about his ex-wife and how his ex-wife treated him. How ridiculous, i actually forgot to warn him about how his children might feel about their divorce. Bloody dumb. I should understand better than anyone else, about having a third party in their family.
Nevermind, i pray for him and his child. Hopefully he'll love his children more after all these hoohahs.

I've hell lots to say. But i cant seem to say it all out.
Is there just anyone free enough and kind enough to call me and allow me to blurt out all these shit inside me?
It doesnt seem too long since i went back to school, but when i returned to school yesterday, I sense the difference in everything,everyone. All my friends appear stranger to me and even the atmosphere is different. I feel suffocated there. Is it me? Or is the same for everyone? I just cant believe i graduated secondary school.
2001, i took my PSLE and managed to scrap through and get on with secondary school life.
2002, entered Sembawang Sec. Thought that place was horrible, but as i proceeded on to sec2, i find that its not bad! And so i continued and went up to sec3. Meet some nice people there, but some are not as nice as i thought. Then sec4, mugged and mugged.
2005,sat for O's.
And now,i received my postings..
Neutral feelings lah,nothing great.